General Discussion

...not planning to die soon, but on the other hand, at my age one feels one's mortality.

We joke in my family about how my matrilineal family, my aunts and uncles and my mother, spent their whole lives talking about dying. This may have been the result of my grandmother's death at an early age - when my mother was eleven - from an a bacterial disease that today would be cured with an antibiotic.

They are, in fact, all dead themselves. Some of their children are dead.

I embraced this somewhat nonsensical approach to life myself more after my mother, consistent with her focus, died when she was 51.

I've outlived both my parents ages when they died, so there's that.

There was a period in my life where I seriously considered suicide, and now that life seems so beautiful and worth living I'm struck with horror to think what I might have missed, specifically the joy of loving my wife.

I'll hang on as long as I can, but again, I feel my mortality. It is a good thing that we do not live forever, I think. It makes life more precious and inspires one to use one's time more wisely.