Saw my first groundhog tonight, finally waking up.... [View all]

Come out to say, "hey Jack, where's my schorgasborg (sic) ??"


Well, I'm normally a "nature-lover"---

but those little bastards have terrorized and/or destroyed my garden
for the past two years (there's a colony next door, and maybe here--
well, they also nest under my front porch, and under the shed out back--)

I tried every 'home remedy' to discourage them, but nothing has worked.

Used a live trap, but only managed to capture one young one, 2 years ago, whom I relocated
(which, as it turns out, is against local law). After that, no dice.

Sprayed ammonia into their holes, etc

Last year, I raised some sunflowers far above ground, until they were more than 2 feet tall,
before I put them into the ground--- (thought they would be safer then, right ??)

then one of them took them all down, one day at a time,
even after I had staked them and tied them up--- and this was way before they even
started to develop any flowers! WTF. I think the mother developed a taste for their leaves...


Well, it's war now. I intend to murder them all.
Ordered that .177 pellet rifle tonight (which purportedly has a velocity greater than a .22 rifle).

Since they now all run when they see me, I intend to shoot them through the screen
of the back-bedroom window...


I didn't want to have to do this---
but to make myself feel better,
I will presume that they are all Republicans!

Want my garden, dammit. Enough is enough.