General Discussion

FORD:
Well, I can see that you’ve got a lot of things you’re gonna want to talk about, so thanks for the drinks and if you could sort of drop us off and the nearest, convenient planet..?

CAPTAIN:
Ah well, that’s a little difficult you see because our trajectory- thingy, was preset before we left Golgafrincham.

FORD:
When are you gonna reach the planet you’re meant to be colonising?

CAPTAIN:
Oh, well we nearly there!… I think… yes. Any second now. Well it’s probably time I got out of the bath in fact. Ha ha. Oh… I don’t know though… why stop just when you’re enjoying it, you know I always say…

ARTHUR:
So we’re actually going to land in a minute?

CAPTAIN:
Well not, not, not so much land in fact, I think as far as I can remember we’re programmed to, er crash on it.

ARTHUR and FORD:
”Crash”?

CAPTAIN:
Yes. It’s all part of the plan. … I think. There was terribly good reason for it which I can’t… quite… remember at the moment.

FORD:
[Yells in exasperation] You’re a load of useless, bloody loonies!!

CAPTAIN:
Ah, yes, that was it, that was reason it was. Ha. Pass me the loofah will you?

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