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marmar

(80,581 posts)
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 10:07 AM Wednesday

Man Guilty Of Vacuum Cleaner Sex






JULY 13--A Florida Man was found guilty today of having sex with a vacuum cleaner outside a home in a gated resort community near Disney World, court records show.

Kevin Westerhold, 51, entered a no contest plea to indecent exposure in connection with the incident earlier this year at the Windsor Hills Resort in Kissimmee.

Following plea negotiations with prosecutors, Westerhold was sentenced this morning to 12 months probation, fined $271, and ordered to undergo a “psycho-sexual evaluation” within the next month. Westerhold was adjudicated guilty of the misdemeanor by Judge Juna Pulayya.

Westerhold was originally charged with a felony, but that count was subsequently reduced when he was named in a misdemeanor criminal information. In an April court filing, Westerhold’s lawyer reported that his client “recently completed in-patient treatment,” though that care was not further described.

According to police reports, a witness provided investigators with photos and videos showing Westerhold “pleasuring himself with a vacuum in broad daylight.” Another witness spotted Westerhold, who was “naked from the waist down,” consorting with the appliance outside a four-bedroom property owned by a female relative. ..................(more)

https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/vacuum-sentence-012748




14 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Man Guilty Of Vacuum Cleaner Sex (Original Post) marmar Wednesday OP
"Consorting with the appliance"! Ocelot II Wednesday #1
Turns out he was JD Vance's upholstery guy Blue Owl Wednesday #4
Someone I know who once worked in the ER.. CousinIT Wednesday #2
The most current ER procedure for such a patient- 3Hotdogs Wednesday #9
. . . CousinIT Wednesday #11
Did they try Danascot 6 hrs ago #14
He's not the most upright fellow Blue Owl Wednesday #3
Well that sucks. twodogsbarking Wednesday #5
🏆 underpants Wednesday #7
I read the headline yesterday and thought it was the onion kimbutgar Wednesday #6
Don't knock it if you haven't tried it. Midnight Writer Wednesday #8
This sort of behavior goes all the way back to Hoover. Beakybird Wednesday #10
Is he an Appliantologist? He's a Latent Appliance Fetishist, it appears to me! JoseBalow Wednesday #12
Clearly his wife has not been vacuuming him often enough. BWdem4life Wednesday #13

Ocelot II

(132,117 posts)
1. "Consorting with the appliance"!
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 10:20 AM
Wednesday

If you can't get that kind of action from a sentient being, go for it, but maybe in the privacy of your living room? I guess a vacuum is a more active partner than a couch, at least.

CousinIT

(12,950 posts)
2. Someone I know who once worked in the ER..
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 10:33 AM
Wednesday

...said a man came in with a vacuum cleaner stuck on his wanker. I can't remember how they said they got it off (I suspect a copious amount of Vaseline or some such)

Sheeeeesh.

3Hotdogs

(15,848 posts)
9. The most current ER procedure for such a patient-
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 12:18 PM
Wednesday

Show the patient the photo of Trump wearing his shitstained pants. The penis will immediately shrink, thus allowing for ease of removal.

kimbutgar

(27,792 posts)
6. I read the headline yesterday and thought it was the onion
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 11:08 AM
Wednesday

Then read it on smoking gun and wasn’t shocked he was Florida man and probably a magaloon.

Beakybird

(3,403 posts)
10. This sort of behavior goes all the way back to Hoover.
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 12:36 PM
Wednesday

I followed up on the story, and they found a tiny creature inside the contraption: half human/half vacuum. No matter who it takes after, it will kinda suck.

JoseBalow

(10,029 posts)
12. Is he an Appliantologist? He's a Latent Appliance Fetishist, it appears to me!
Wed Jul 15, 2026, 01:35 PM
Wednesday
A Latent Appliance Fetishist
Is a person who refuses to admit to his or herself
That sexual gratification can only be achieved
Through the use of machines!
Get the picture?


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