Kash Patel Wins Official 'Hegseth Microdick' Award For Firing FBI Agent Who Had Gay Pride Flag

Big man. Biiiiiiiig maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.

EVAN HURST
OCT 03, 2025



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Kash Patel, the most beclowned FBI director in the history of the US or any other country’s equivalent, took a break from (allegedly!) writing Sharpie messages on bullets to tweet as “evidence” of the latest Transgender Antifa Democrat crime (allegedly!) to fire an FBI agent for … having a gay pride flag on his desk last year?

Kash did this — while not solving crimes LMAO LOL of course not — on the first day of the government shutdown, we guess to make clear that … what? No faggots allowed? God hates fags?

We’d take time to wonder what known homosexuals Ric Grenell or Scott Bessent or the Log Cabin Republicans think about this, but those greedy little white prisses have zero self-respect, and they’re too busy trying to prove they’re worthy of hanging out with the straight Republican men whose dicks attention they crave to bother with the affairs of LGBTQ people who actually love themselves.

(Out and proud gay Wonkette managing editor Evan Hurst — this writer! — says you’re always gonna be faggots, boys, no matter what you do.) … Anyway, back to Kash.

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